Day 234

Ava's gas was 33 today. They changed her PIC line today and put another one in. Hopefully the infection will be out and it was just in that old PIC line. Her white blood cell count went up from 11 to 17 so they couldn't take her off sedation or paralytic. I realized today that she is in a coma. I asked the nurse and she said she is in an induced coma. She can't swallow, can't blink her eyes, can't make moisture in her eyes (they put some kind of gel directly on her eyeballs to produce moisture), but she can get upset by watching her heart rate. I washed her up today and suctioned her trach and mouth. She knew what was going on because her heart rate was in the high 130s and 140s. I brought Ali in and she was so good watching a movie while I took care of Ava. Ali was asking questions about why Ava didn't move. It's hard seeing her like this another day. I don't even know how many days this has been. I couldn't help myself by putting a headband that I bought the other day on her head. She looks so beautiful, but I don't like moving her eyelids and looking at her blank stare or cleaning her up and feeling her body be so limp.

Praying for Ava to get healthy...